Doctor Strange, Midnight Library, and the “What Could Have Been”s
The concept of a multiverse excites us about the possibility of us living different lives. But the growing popularity of this theory may be reinforced by our increasing tendency to regret.
Spoiler alert: this writing below will reveal some important details about the film Doctor Strange: Multiverse of Madness and Matt Haig’s novel The Midnight Library. If you haven’t watched the movie or read the book (and you wanted to), please continue at your own peril.
Last week, I watched Doctor Strange: Multiverse of Madness. It was a pretty good film. Sam Raimi in his directorial debut in Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) brought new colors to the superhero film franchise. This is the first time, I guess, that an MCU movie incorporates so many horror and jumpscare elements. It was different, and I liked it.
In this sequel, Dr. Stephen Strange had to deal with Wanda Maximoff (Scarlet Witch) who turned berserk because her mind was corrupted by the Darkhold — a magical book of the damned, they said. Wanda had suffered enough. She had to kill her humanoid lover, Vision, so Thanos could not apprehend him. But it proved to be a vain attempt. Her vision to be with Vision and create a normal happy family, vanished.
She acknowledged the existence of parallel universes (multiverses, as we call them) in separate dimensions. She realized that, out of the infinite possibilities of the multiverses, there must be one world where she could really be a mother. The grief and trauma she has endured made her want to do anything to live that possibility.
If I continue the story, I might as well narrate the whole movie for you. Not so interesting, right? So, let’s talk about the multiverse instead.
The concept of a parallel universe has been a popular trope in fiction. It is not the first time this concept is brought to the big screen. The most popular example of a film bringing up alternate reality is, of course, The Wizard of Oz. It is the story of Dorothy Gale and her dog accidentally wandering into the magical Land of Oz. There is also a popular concept in Japanese fiction called isekai (異世界), where the character (usually the protagonist) is swept into a surreal fantasy universe.
Even though the trope of the multiverse is not so new, watching Doctor Strange: MoM made me reminded of one novel I’ve read recently. Yeah, it is The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. The novel won the Goodreads Choice Awards 2020 in the fiction category. I love this novel. It is one of the few pieces of fiction that I read last year but it came high as one of the best books I read in 2021. You can check my book review below (it is in Indonesian).
The Midnight Library
This novel tells a story of a young woman named Nora Seed, who attempted suicide by drinking all her antidepressants. Her attempt made her into a state of oblivion, where she met a familiar figure — Mrs. Elm, an old woman she knew back in Elementary School. In this mental limbo, she enters a mysterious library. The books inside this library turned out to be alternate stories of her life, which she can access by reading them.
The story then carries on with the universes she ‘tried’. She wanted to see those alternate lives she could have lived. She is surprised that there are many other lives where she could be in a much better place than her own reality. This also unveiled, little by little, the unfortunate circumstances in her real life that made her try to end her life.
There is one reality where she could have a quality relationship with her lover, rather than the lonely single life she is having. There are also realities with her having much more exciting careers and life, rather than making a living as a shopkeeper in a small somber town in England. She could try them all, just by opening different books.
But as you could expect from the trope, she began to realize that even the best alternate reality doesn’t bring her true peace and joy. She learned her lesson — that the best life she could live in the current life she is living. So she woke up from the limbo, knowing that her suicide attempt turns out to be failed (thank God). And she (with her surreal experience), began to see the bigger picture: the true lesson of living life, as it is, to the fullest.
The meaning of multiverses
It’s amusing to imagine that there are parallel universes where we could live different lives. Just like the possibility of a universe where Sorcerer Supreme Wong running around naked, there is also possibly a universe where I could be a multiple Grammy award-winning musical artist-producer. That universe must be infinitely more exciting than my current life. At least that’s what I imagined.
You see, whether the multiverses are real or not, the concept behind it is interesting, at least what it means emotionally to us. Multiverses symbolize the “what could’ve been’s”, the roads not taken, the opportunity costs. However, thinking about “what could’ve been” too much can lead to regret. Regret is powerful, somber feeling. It takes our happiness like a vacuum cleaner, sucks us from the moment, and sends us daydreaming about the better things that could or should happen.
But that’s the point. We cannot access the multiverses (at least for now), even if it is real. It is a waste of time, and waste of emotional reserve.
But if it actually can be entered, well…it brings us to Wanda Maximoff’s backstory.
If we could, is it wise for us to enter a parallel universe where our lives could be better? If that reality is actually better, when will we finally settle? Won’t there be an infinite amount of more exciting lives that could happen? Won’t the pursuit of a perfect reality will end up corrupting our very happiness, which resides right now, at the moment?
To be fair, Wanda Maximoff only pursued one thing: a universe where she could be a mother. She knew exactly what she wants. She promised Doctor Strange that after she get what she wants, she would not bother him, or the Kamar Taj. But it turned out she wanted more than just being a mother. She wanted the power of America Chavez so she could travel between universes, quoting from her ‘ to find every solution from every problem’.
This is the time in the story when Wanda showed her need for control. Putting myself in her shoes, I think I understand her frustration. Imagine being one of the most powerful figures in the superhero universe (with her witchcraft and magical abilities), but still cannot have it her way — the way she simply wanted to be in peace with her lover. Wong (while being held captive) reminded her sternly that
“You can’t control everything.”
Shit happens
We must have been in Wanda’s (or Nora’s) position, at least emotionally. We have endured (or still in [bless you in these tough times]) hardships — the frustrating period where we hoped with our might that things should have been better. Perhaps we lament our predicament, which the cause is usually beyond our control. Or worse, we regret the things within our control. The terrible decisions that lead to a chain of unfortunate events, or the irreversible action (or inaction) that cannot be undone. No matter how well of we are, we must have felt disappointment and regret.
The bad times are an inseparable part of life. The wisdom is definitely easier said than done. The nature of hardship itself is uncomfortable and painful. We want to escape from the period immediately. But some hardships are harder than others when we feel so dispirited that we can’t hope that better things will come, eventually.
It is humane to feel that way. To feel lost. To lose hope. But one thing I keep telling myself is this is what makes life as it is. It is as beautiful as it is appalling. It is as full of joy as it is full of misery. The oscillating wave of fate will continue its unpredictable swing, sometimes to the better, or the other times— to the worse.
It will be like that until we cannot feel anything — when we are deprived of our senses, escape this world, and enter the afterlife.
When life takes an unexpected turn into a path that we don’t prefer, it is normal to feel disappointed. The gap between our expectations and reality will make us feel unhappy. The more we want something, the longer the disappointment lingers.
Sometimes, the way we manifest our disappointment is by playing the alternate reality (the better one) in our heads. That is essentially regret. While learning from past experiences is important, keeping our minds on the past is in no way productive or mentally healthy.
We should remember that time is ticking. It is reminding us that, our time living this mundane life will be shorter, second by second. But it also reminds us that we still have the present, the time we can spend living our own reality, doing things that increase the chance of approximating our dream reality. Among all the things that are beyond our control, we still have personal agency.
“Know they will be loved.”
This is the sentence that completes the moral arc of Wanda in the movie. It is when the Wanda (the Earth 838 Wanda who actually has two sons) made peace with her violent other self who tried to take her place in her universe.
For me, this sole sentence conveys a very powerful message, both for the Doctor Strange story and for our notion of the multiverse. It reminds us that our alternate reality (that we deemed as better) can take care of itself. It’s their fortune to have good things in parallel with our not so unfortunate time. We have to make peace with our alternate realities, to let them run their course. It also means we have to forgive ourselves for our missteps, so the feeling of regret withers over time.
Also don’t forget that as long as it is life, they will encounter hardships too, perhaps in different periods and in ways that we could not imagine (because we don’t live our alternate selves’ life).
The analogous moment for The Midnight Library is when Nora Seed exclaims “I don’t want to die!”, so she could escape the limbo and get back to her old life. It is when she realizes that she still has everything to spark joy. Even after visiting various realities, she learned her lesson that the best reality is her own.
So remember the next time we think about things that should have been, the grass is always greener in other realities.
